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Sofas

skata
I have a superpower. I'm not kidding, it really is a superpower. It's one of the crappier ones, but it doesn't qualify me as a villain or evil genius or anything, and it's freaky enough to be 'super', so let's go with 'superpower'.

I can generate sofas.

This would be cool if I could just get them to appear, Douglas Adams style, in the middle of a stairwell or out of the sky. Maybe then I would be a, slightly quirky, evil something or other. But no, it's just one or two more than any sane person needs at a time. All the time.

Not once in my entire adult life have I owned less than two sofas. Often more. And they show up, beg for attention, some TLC and maybe a place in my basement or on the attic. I almost always say yes, since I also have a knack for passing them along, but I never say yes to a sofa knowing that I would hand it over. It's always with the intention to keep it, at least for a little while.

Fast forward to today.

I've bought a sofa. A new one. One that haven't seen other people (or their backsides) before. That have never happened before. I usually just end up with one, I don't choose it, order it and pay (insane amounts) for it. A nominal sum of course, never before more than, say 100 USD. Never. Until now. I feel strange.

The sofa will show up, wrapped in plastic tomorrow, and the one that used to occupy the living room is now safely tucked away in the attic. I've even found new owners for the old one (as I said - passing them along is part of the power), but it will stay in the attic for another month. And then I'll be down to one sofa. A new one.

It feels strange, and a bit like I've cheated on my superpower, but I'm looking forward to the new addition to my long list of sofa co-habitants. It's red, velvet and big. It comes with matching armchair. It could be the cryptonite to my power, but I've had a long run and done some good with it. Time to pass it on and settle down, I think. Maybe settle down in a matching armchair.

Comments

( 10 comments — Leave a comment )
jehanearbonne
Apr. 11th, 2011 08:19 pm (UTC)
Vuxenpoäng!
lindorm
Apr. 11th, 2011 08:30 pm (UTC)
Skämta icke! Och allt pysslet för att få det här soffköpet att gå igenom! Först kasta skräp, sen organisera om vind och källare, sen packetera gamla soffan och bära upp den, sen städa hela vardagsrummet, sen tömma hallen och först imorgon kommer den nya. Puh! Men det kommer att bli fint. Och underligt nytt ...
jehanearbonne
Apr. 11th, 2011 09:44 pm (UTC)
Det är en fantastisk känsla. Konstig, men bekräftande på nåt sätt.

Om det känns för vuxet kan du alltid planera roliga saker att göra med emballage-plasten. Man kan göra mycket roligt cyberpunkigt med emballageplast...
firynze
Apr. 12th, 2011 01:30 am (UTC)
As long as the new sofa can be gotten up the stairs, I think it shall all end happily. Well, assuming it doesn't bring along a litter of loveseats, free to good home...

Red and velvet! Sounds LOVELY.
lindorm
Apr. 12th, 2011 06:26 am (UTC)
Yeah. Up the stairs and in through the door! I woke up the day after we payed for it with a scream, certain that it wouldn't fit through the bloody door (our hallway is narrow and theres a closet just opposite the doorway). I've considered making a mockup of carton, just to check. Sweetest tries to calm me down and talks about the professionals that will be carrying the sofa. They have delivered many a sofa before, he tells me, but I'm sure that our doorway is trickier than any other (keep in mind all the sofas that I've carried in and out of it so far).

Oh well. When I return from work today it'll probably be in place and I can relax.
lindorm
Apr. 12th, 2011 06:47 am (UTC)
It's supposed to be 'paid', right? Damn.
firynze
Apr. 12th, 2011 01:18 pm (UTC)
Either that, or you will have the start of a grand adventure involving ghosts and time travel!
lindorm
Apr. 12th, 2011 01:22 pm (UTC)
Yes, or that. :)
(Anonymous)
Apr. 14th, 2011 10:04 am (UTC)
Can't wait to get involved
Hey - I am really happy to find this. cool job!
fagedeco
Apr. 15th, 2011 12:37 pm (UTC)
I don’t bookmark sites but i will bookmark this! LOL!

( 10 comments — Leave a comment )

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skata
lindorm
lindorm

Reading:

Read 2011
Ghost Story by Jim Butcher
Cirkeln av Sara Bergmark Elfgren och Mats Strandberg
Heartless by Gail Carriger
Dead Iron Devon Monk
Hounded by Kevin Hearne
I Shall Wear Midnight by Terry Pratchett
Red Glove by Holly Black
The Gathering by Kelley Armstrong
Dead Reckoning by Charlaine Harris
Dead in the Family by Charlaine Harris
Deathless by Cat Valente
The Unwritten 3
The Sea Thy Mistress by Elisabeth Bear
Bone and Jewel Creatures by Elisabeth Bear
By the Mountain Bound by Elisabeth Bear
Magic Slays by Ilona Andrews
The White City by Elisabeth Bear
Silver Borne by Patricia Briggs
The Poison Eaters by Holly Black
Wintersmith by Terry Pratchett
All My Darling Daughters Fumi Yoshinaga
Unnatural Creatures Sarah Monette
All the Windwracked Stars by Elizabeth Bear
The Wee Free Men by Terry Pratchett
A Hat Full of Sky by Terry Pratchett
Die For Me by Amy Plum
Nightwatch by Terry Pratchett
Bloodshot by Cherie Priest

In Limbo:
Magic for Beginners by Kelly Link
Miss Peregrines Home for Peculiar Children
Kraken by China Mieville
Cast in Secret by Michelle Sagara
Desolation Road by Ian Mc Donald
Who Killed Amanda Palmer? by Neil Gaiman
A Murder of Angels by Kate Griffin
The Peshawar Lancers S.M. Stirling
Crystal Rain Tobias S Buckell
Fragile Things by Neil Gaiman
Shadows Over Bakerstreet

Read 2010
At the Mountains of Madness by Lovecraft & Culbard (graphic novel)
Vem är Arvid Pekon? av Karin Tidbeck
Grandville Mon Amour by Bryan Talbot
Fables 14 by Bill Willingham et al.
Fables 13 by Bill Willingham et al.
Bayou Moon by Ilona Andrews
On the Edge by Ilona Andrews
Magic Bleeds by Ilona Andrews
Magic Strikes by Ilona Andrews
Magic Burns by Ilona Andrews
Magic Bites by Ilona Andrews
Side Jobs by Jim Butcher
The Unwritten 2
The Iron Duke by Meljean Brook
Blameless by Gail Carriger
Theos occulta mysterier - De förlorade sidornas bok
Blacksad
Theos occulta mysterier - Mumiens blod
Echo
The Unwritten
Rex Mundi 1
A Discovery of Witches by Deborah Harkness
Cinderella: From Fabletown with Love by Bill Willingham et al.
Amatka av Karin Tidbeck (ms format)
Leviathan by Scott Westerfield
Blodläge av Johan Theorin
Nattfåk av Johan Theorin
Skumtimmen av Johan Theorin
Dreadnought by Cherie Priest
Changeless by Gail Carriger
Unseen Academicals by Terry Pratchett
White Cat by Holly Black
Instructions by Neil Gaiman
Blood Promise by Richelle Mead
Fables 12
Fables 11
Changes by Jim Butcher
Freedom & Necessity by Steven Brust & Emma Bull
Succubus Shadows by Richelle Mead
Fathom by Cherie Priest
Territory by Emma Bull
Four and Twenty Blackbirds by Cherie Priest
Sorcerer's House by Gene Wolfe
Soulless by Gail Carriger
Palimpsest by Catherynne Valente
Half a Crown by Jo Walton
Turn Coat by Jim Butcher
Archangel's Kiss by Nalini Singh
Kitty's House of Horrors by Carrie Vaugh
The Red Tree by Caitlín Kiernan
Bone Crossed by Patricia Briggs
The Bone Key by Sarah Monette

Read 2009:
Dragon Keeper by Robin Hobb
A Touch of Dead by Charlaine Harris
Queen Victoria Demon Hunter by A.E. Moorat
The Boneshaker by Cherie Priest
The Good Neighbors Book 2 - Kith by Holly Black
Grandville by Bryan Talbott
Grave Secret by Charlaine Harris
The Magicians by Lev Grossman
Shadow Kiss by Richelle Mead
The Osiris Ritual by George Mann
City of Glass by Cassandra Clare
Wet Moon 5
Fables vol 10 by Bill Willingham
Madame Xanadu:Disenchanted(graphic novel) by Matt Wagner & Amy Reeder Hadley
Angel's Blood by Nalini Singh
39 Clues, Benknotornas labyrint
Living With the Dead by Kelley Armstrong
Space Captain Smith by Toby Frost
Virtu by Sarah Monette
Mélusine by Sarah Monette
Shadow Kiss by Richelle Mead
The Frightened Man by Kenneth Cameron
Frostbite by Richelle Mead
Hand of Isis by Jo Graham
NorseCODE by Greg van Eekehout
Nattinatti ed. Nene Ormes
Making Money by Terry Pratchett
Water Babyby Ross Campbell
Going Postal (audio) by Terry Pratchett
Kitty Raises Hell by Carrie Vaughn
Santa Olivia by Jaqueline Carey
Succubus Heat by Richelle Mead
The Awakening by Kelley Armstrong
Hostage to Pleasure by Nalini Singh
Mine to Posess by Nalini Singh
Dead and Gone by Charlaine Harris
Children of God by Mary Doria Russel
Zombie Queen of Newbury High by Amanda Ashby
Seven for a Secret by Elizabeth Bear
Wet Moon 3 by Ross Campbell
The Good Neighbors Book 1 - Kin by Holly Black
Pride and Prejudice and Zombies by Jane Austen and Seth Grahame-Smith
Wet Moon 2 by Ross Campbell
Breathers by S.G. Browne
Death's Daughter by Amber Benson
City of Ashes by Cassandra Clare
The End of Mr Y by Scarlett Thomas
Black Ships by Jo Graham
Men of the Otherworld by Kelley Armstrong
Clockwork Heart by Dru Pagliossotti
The Affinity Bridge by George Mann
Udda av Nene Ormes (finally re-written enough before the publisher works it over)
Small Favor by Jim Bucher
Kitty and the Dead Man's Hand by Carrie Vaughn
Tales of Beedle the Bard by J.K. Rowling
Paris Immortal, a vampire tale by S. Roit
Mean Streets by Jim Butcher et al.
Lonley Werewolf Girl by Martin Millar
Sunshine by Robin McKinley
Ha'penny by Jo Watson
Farthing by Jo Watson
Cast in Courtlight by Michelle Sagara
Cast in Shadow by Michelle Sagara
The Court of the Air by Stephen Hunt

Read 2008:
Legenden om Sally Jones av Jakob Wegelius
Succubus Dreams by Richelle Mead
Backup by Jim Butcher
Caressed by Ice Nalini Singh
Visions of Heat by Nalini Singh
Slave to Sensation by Nalini Singh
The Glass Book of the Dream Eaters by G.W. Dahlquist
Red Seas Under Red Skies by Scott Lynch
Personal Demon by Kelley Armstrong
Ironside by Holly Black
The Lies of Locke Lamora by Scott Lynch
Cill Factor by Rachel Caine
Heat Stroke by Rachel Caine
I taket lyser stjärnorna av Johanna Thydell
Ill Wind by Rachel Caine
Stray by Rachel Vincent
The Summoning by Kelley Armstrong
A Companion to Wolves by Sarah Monette and Elizabeth Bear
The Somnambulist by Jonathan Barnes
Nattens bibliotek av Alberto Manguel
White Night by Jim Butcher
Panik av Jeff Abbott
Mer än ögat ser/ Wicked Lovely by Melissa Marr
Iakttagelserna av Jane Harris
Proven Guilty by Jim Butcher
Blood and Iron by Elizabeth Bear
Katja Aronssons oskuld av Therése Mellby
Mellanting av Kikki Nillasdotter
Succubus Nights by Richelle Mead
Människohamn av John Ajvide Lindqvist
The Graveyard Book by Neil Gaiman
The Marriages Between Zones Three, Four and Five by Doris Lessing
Blood Rites by Jim Butcher
Dead Girls are Easy by Terri Garey
New Amsterdam by Elizabeth Bear
The Fall of the Kings by Ellen Kushner & Delia Sherman
Death Masks by Jim Butcher
Something from the Nightside by Simon R. Green
From Dead to Worse by Charlaine Harris
Summer Knight by Jim Butcher
The Game by Diana Wynne Jones
Grave Peril by Jim Butcher
Odd and the Frost Giants by Neil Gaiman
The Anubis Gates by Tim Powers
Claymore 1 by Norihiro Yagi

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